Well pour some sugar on me.
I was a proud rocker, all teased hair and black eyeliner, when I attended my small-town high school in the 1980s so when I encountered this little number I couldn't resist hopping aboard the crazy train for a little trip down memory lane.
I found it while rummaging around the sale racks at H&M at Yorkdale Mall (I am way too dependent on H&M by the way, but that is a whole other post). Anyway, it was a steal for only $39.99 and it really cleans up nicely when I wear it with black tights, clunky black shoes and the shockingly expensive chain-link belt my husband bought me for my birthday last month.
It's 20 years later and I am still wearing a freaking demin mini dress! I am so outre, I've got to be cool!
And besides, this dress just makes me want to smuggle a mickey of peach schnapps into the Sadie Hawkins dance, talk smack about the cheerleading team and make out with the French exchange student.
Again.
Peach [shudder] schnappes. And I'd buried that memory...
Posted by: metro mama | October 17, 2007 at 07:21 PM
I have struggled for 12 years in a relationship that was less than fair. A man that got worse and worse every year with is wild idea's and his mental abuse and physical abuse to the point of even black mail and attempt to kill me physically. What do you do but to end up suffering even more living in poverty on the below, below poverty on social assistant $12000.000 and even less at times depending on your situation at the time, living in poverty women mostly and visiting food banks limited to how much starchy, can foods mostly, to eat in Ontario. Applying for legal aid and housing was the biggest struggle. To qualify you have to have so much red tape and paper work that it is in creditable running back and forth jumping through hoops with no money is not easy not even having transportation. Family members are even cruel to family members that need help. Yet we will support other in other countries like the Philippians but God forbid your twin sister may have to ask for a place to live, so she doesn't have to live in a shelter till she can get housing or a place to lay her head in the winter cold months with the only few to no option. This is the question, to live on the street in 30 below weather or moving from church to Salvation Army safe homes every four weeks you’re only allowed to live in Ontario shelters so you have to keep moving. I moved 19 times in one year. I am not a drug addict or a smoker even or a bad person even. A women that has prided herself all her life in helping others and even my husband was a man I helped create a home and better life for but he was to ill and to far gone mentally to understand what love was and did not care to get help and get well and live a healthy life style. His addiction to bad habit and bad moods and nasty insults and control meant more to him than I did. Yet my family struggled with helping me, never was I so shocked and disappointed in human being that I had helped from time to time. They closed there doors because they are to proud to help some one in there family that maybe in trouble that was a person of independence to ashamed that this is really happening to one of there family members, everyone living in such perfect lives themselves that they are to good and do not want any trouble on there door steps attitude.
Yet when it came to asking from me my personal affect's while I was unloading my personal affects from a moving truck into a small tiny apartment they had the nerve to say can I have this and that. Shock and with no room I gave them what they wanted ashamed and insulted at the same time as they would never ask do you need some place to store your things till you get a place, and offer some storage space for a few months till things changed for me. NO, NO.. That would be too much to ask or think of some one else beside there own selves. I could see the self centered behavior and greed in there eyes and angry if I said not you can not have that. No pride and no shame. In some people we are living in a guilt free society where give me give me is all that is on peoples mind.
Greed and self centre behavior and not a bit of shame or guilt did this family feel taking and giving so little. Free hand out from rich working class that have more than I ever had in all my life. Two cars in the drive way and steady jobs with money in the bank and huge homes and hobbies but no why do they feel they would give up anything or reach out and help a family member that was in a situation that most women do not want to be in but that is life in the world of men being abusive and a world ignoring even their own family members that need help.
Turning my back would not ever happen if the shoe where on the other foot and everyone of my sister in-laws and family know that I would take my last dime and take them in a second if they has issues in life and try and open my life up to support my own family in need of attention. Never asking for money ever before or help I found that people in my family shockingly selfish that it is embarrassment to me and I feel anger that these people treated me so badly. Finding out behind your back that they latterly grieved over helping me. I questioned myself what did I ever do to them that they hate helping anyone so much. I know of nothing I did but show these people love and kindness ever where I spent money helping there children every Christmas buying the best gift I could and flying home just to spend Christmas with my family should have been a honor to them but they looked at it differently.
Even asking them for help was hard, as I was not use to having to ask my family for help and afraid that they would reject me that would hurt more than my situation alone.
Then going on to getting justice was even harder "Legal Aid" and there lawyers are fighting for low wages given from legal aid to lawyers. So no one wants to take on legal aid as they can not afford to work for so low wages.
Well maybe lawyers have to realize that not all people are millionaires and not all people make $400.00 hour which most good lawyer feel that is there fee. Lawyer have gotten way out of control and the is latterly no laws to force lawyer to cut there wages to what the market place can endure in forms of how to price there cost of doing business and lower the cost to what people can afford.
Prices in legal cost are so lawyers do not have to work all there lives and want to retire young. Well, I must tell you most of us would like this but we are not at the liberty to live such arrogant lifestyle's and we have to work for much lower wages just reality.
It is not right women are going though time where they need a lawyer and then to find out that no lawyer under legal aid want to represent women in abuse cases and legal aid refuse to deal with civil matters totally. So no justice for abuse situation at all in the legal aid situation only division of property and support.
If you can find a good lawyer, as I found, I had to firer a lawyer as she was doing next to little work for me. Just horrible what I seen and heard from this lawyer and her complaints was she was not getting paid enough from legal aid to work and do what I felt needed to be done. Yet I was forced by legal aid to sign an agreement that I pay out of my division of property my fees so it was not for free.
I had to pay this lawyer her cost and she refuse to stand up and fight for me or give me any legal advise when I asked for things it was always she did not have the answer or I should ask another lawyer. Rushing me into a out of court settlement with no support, as I was in a command law relationship for 12 years and I was not entitled to anything in the relationship but what I had my name on and I had receipts for.
Every lawyer, I talked to have a "different law book on command law marriages," he was reading from. Changing laws depending how much money you paid him or her. Just in creditable what I uncovered about lawyer's and justice system.
Money talk's and justice walk's when it comes to women issues.
No one wants to take {legal aid clients}; I called tons and same story they all complained about how little {legal aid} was paying them.
When something going to be done for women in this country about this situation we have and women are facing. When are families like mine, going to start blaming themselves for contributing to the suffering in the world when it is so bad that people in families disconnect from knowing one another just so they do not have to help any one but themselves. This is truly sad way of looking at life and people very sick society and people should not have to tolerate more abuse after going through such abuse to find cruel and selfish family members that only care about themselves and the heck with the sister.
We have groups to help millions of women in other countries to stand up and fight for women rights in other countries and movies being made of the suffering in other countries. What about right here! In our own back yard, I refuse buy a paper to read more in new media about other countries suffering when I felt and experienced and seen the suffering right here right now in Ontario to millions of women suffering in shelter that are cut back and having difficulties in there own staff with negative attitudes towards women in shelter yet Americans living in our shelters get treated to live for two years there till they can get there paper work in order to become a citizen of Canada because they married a American I also seen this. Arrogant women on staff in shelters, treating women badly and disrespecting other women. I was asked to leave because I cleaned and worked hard and asked for justice in the shelter even towards myself being abused by staff in Waterloo women Shelter.
It is time we spend money on services for women and have investigation done. Many run down services like legal aid and need to open the door for justice to happen for women in Ontario Canada.
I do not feel that women in Canada should have to experience what I had to go through.
I am a senior women of 55 and have many pain's and it is hard for me to get around as I no longer can do what I was able to do when I was younger as my body just is not as agile and I have arthritis in my joints.
Yet who cares about senior women that had to work hard all there life and are showing signs of worn out mentally and physically as I am burnt out fighting working so hard for low wage jobs only available for women coming from a mother and father that did not save money for there children’s education as they were to busy drinking alcohol and partying. Forced to leave home because of too much fighting in the home and abuse to children I got little education so I did what I could to educate myself and succeeded to keep myself alive on low income jobs with limited education. This is still happening in many families’ today same things for children.
In my heart I will never give up loving and caring for people and hope that there is more women like myself that can understand women need to support each other and find time to write your Mp and Mpp and fight for justice right here in Ontario to improve the rights of women to have legal representation in court and fight for justice and it is our right to have civil matters dealt with and if women do not have funds to do this than find funds from the surplus from our government have them support programs like legal aid more, for women right to fair and good lawyers to be paid. Or governments regulate the Legal Industry more so that lawyers are held accountable. Regulation of fair cost's that
The market can afford to use lawyers again. The way it is now only the rich can afford lawyers. Is that fair.
The citizens groups judge and make lawyers accountable, every one knows lawyers will not go against lawyers and police will not go against police and doctor's will not go against doctor's. Complaints department should be made up of citizens not of this profession as this is favourtizum. Invested interest you might say.
Justice is why, every thing in these area's are so messed up as no one wants to change anything as for years they have been making millions and now no one has the money to pay these people millions so they can retire early. So lawyers are angry and refuse to service legal aid.
No one make what lawyers make an hour and why should they have higher wages that no one can afford to pay.
Only the very rich in this country can afford there lawyers fee's that is reality, while the working class has no where to find justice. Poor working class needs justice to and doctors and police protection.
Working class poor have a right to access these areas of need in our society.
We need government to regulate these industries and regulate so that it is accessible to all people in society.
It is our right to have access to lawyers,doctor's,police. hospitals,social services that people are not living in poverty on etc when needed.
Not only the rich can afford these services, but the people that need the help are not getting it without more and more abuse from these services to make women wait on long eight year waiting list and even be denied some services in Ontario.
Governments have to wake up to lowering these multie billion dollar industries so that normal every day citizens can afford access when needed to better and more efficient services. Without the struggles and abuse women are having to experience.
Posted by: Darlene Rozon | October 19, 2007 at 08:57 AM