Diva's Guide to Fall's Fashion Must-Haves

Remember when fall meant hitting the mall with your mom in search of the perfect back to school outfit that would instantly transform you into the most sought-after girl in junior high?

Well, fall is right around the corner and just because you're not heading back to school doesn't mean you can't hit the shops in search of fall trends that will make you feel like a schoolgirl again.

Okay, maybe not exactly like a schoolgirl. I mean, there are some cool, wearable trends on offer this fall but they aren't, you know, magic clothes.

And really, who wants to feel like a schoolgirl again anyway? Not me. I was many years removed from academia before I got truly in touch with my diva side.

But it's not about me anyway. It's about the clothes. I picked 10 fall fashion must haves from Elle magazine's September 2008 issue and I'm gonna look at five this week. Ready? Let's do this thing.

1. Pencil Skirts - Hooray! Sexy, yet practical and flattering for all body types, the pencil skirt is definitely a trend I wholeheartedly endorse. Wear one with sleek hose and stilettos and work the corporate man-killer vibe or pair it with funky tights and clunky shoes or boots for an edgier take. A+

  2. Colored Fur - Boo! and also Hooray! Boo because real fur coats suck no matter what color they are. Even leaving aside the obvious ethical issues, they're expensive and ostentatious and just plain over the top. Hooray because methinks this trend will yield lots of cool and colorful faux fur jackets which are a ton of fun and usually cheap, which is great because no matter how cool that furry magenta number you buy looks this falls, it's gonna be cringe-worthy by next year. Guaranteed. B-

3. The Pastel Winter Coat - Are you freaking kidding me? I have a toddler. I am not going to wear something every single day during an endless Canadian winter unless it hides dirt. I also have neither the time nor the bucks to invest in a new winter coat that is going to require a trip to the dry cleaners once a week. Now that's just me. They are lovely to look at so if you're rich, childless and looking to forge a deeper relationship with your dry cleaner, feel free to indulge. C-

4. Short Trousers - I repeat, are you freaking kidding me? Have you seen these puppies? They're like normal pants cut six to eight inches too short. They make 15-year-old Russian models look dumpy: wear these and spend an entire season reassuring people that there isn't actually a flood. F

5. Leather pants - You probably already realize this, but just in case, I'm gonna come right out and say it: No, just no. Trust me, unless you are younger than 21, weight less than 100 pounds or have sold more than 1 million albums, it would behoove you to give this trend a pass. F.

Okay, that's our fashion lesson for this week. Check back in this space in two weeks time when I'll tackle five more fall fashion must-haves. And don't despair, I got most of the silly ones out the way this week. Next time I'll highlight a few that might just get you a date for the Sadie Hawkins dance yet.

Or, you know, not.

Comments

[mandy]

Hmmmm... leather pants... I think my husband might like those for me once I'm no longer pregnant. He'd accessorize with a whip and some high heeled boots... oh wait. Is this a PG site?

;)

[April]

I think I have to say "are you freaking kidding me" to all of 'em. Stiletto heels? Yeah, OhMommy I'm so NOT!

[Thursday]

Hoorah, hoorah, hooray for pencil skirts. I shall spend the Autumn (I'm British) and Winter in these with cashmere, heels, vintage beads and handbag.

[zoom]

I should forward this to my 68-year-old mother, who wears leather pants whenever she wants to look especially good. I haven't had the heart to tell her she looks like a sausage in them.

[kittenpie]

I have been looking at those lovely pastel winter coats for the last few years going, "How? How do you keep a white / ice blue / baby pink coat clean in a city environment, never mind my tendency to spill or the fact that I have a child?" Beautiful, but totally impractical.

And leather? I'll stick to my leather kilt which manages not to have the same vibe as leather pants. It actually looks fall cozy with a sweater instead.

[Ellyn]

I am so glad I read this. I was just getting ready to head out for this years leather pants and fake fur pastel coat. One more fashion faux pas avoided. Thanks.

[Meredith]

I'm liking the colored fur thing as well, faux fur, natch! I used to design and make women's clothing in my spare time and it's good to know my crazy colored faux fur toppers aren't out of style... yet!

[chelle]

Furs? That is just nasty. At least with the leather pants someone is at McDonald's eating the rest of the animal ... Hopefully NOT wearing leather pants!

[Cheri @ Blog This Mom!]

Yes!

Although I have to be honest, I MIGHT have figured out the skip-the-leather-pants thing on my own.

Excellent article, Diva, excellent!

[imbeingHeldHostage]

Fun fun fun!
I'm all for the fake fur, bring it on-- Ooh, and pencil skirts with stilettos-- Hubby may not let me leave the house :-)

[Dawn]

Short trousers! You've got to be kidding me! If they didn't look so bad, I'd embrace this trend just because it would mean easier shopping for me- most pants are too short for me, but I consider the effort of finding long pants well worth it. ;)

[Woman in a window]

I'm just to be able to pull pants on and not panic with sweat.

Oh boy, FLOODS! We made fun of people who wore FLOODS when I was a kid. Yep, to dark coats I'm with you on that one and I'm gonna have to do something really drastic before you see me in leather pants. Who decides all this stuff anyway?

[kgirl]

Since the only clothes shopping I do these days is at the grocery store, I might make it into a pencil skirt if Joe designs one.

[nomotherearth]

Sadly, I'm with Kgirl in the shopping arena. Plus, I don't try on clothes anymore. Just eyeball them for size and hope to hell they fit.