drunken klutz crafting: pillowcase dress

Dusting off the crafty hat:

A pillowcase dress! Doesn't that sound fun for a little girl? Plus, people are paying beau-coup bucks for them on Ebay.

Why not? It sounds easy.

First, read this. Then get the template from here. Then realize you don't sew. Unh-uh. You don't. Well, hell. But wait! They make glue for this, don't they?? Resolve to make a nearly sew-less version.

Then find some pillowcases you can cut up and not feel badly about. Suggestion: do NOT take the ones off your bed. Your formerly oblivious-to-linens husband? Will notice. Damn his eyes.

Then spread out your materials.

• pillowcase
• gluey stuff (stitch adhesive) (While it looks like Elmers, smells like Elmers, and works like Elmer's? Be warned that it is NOT Elmers.)
• sharp scissors
• rick-rack

Follow the directions as closely as you can. Swear (a LOT.) Cut raggedy (ass. The term is raggedy-ass.)

Line at (closed) top of pillowcase. (The scissors are NOT as sharp as I thought they were.)

Using template, cut the armholes. (Or armscyes, as they're actually called.)Take the strip you cut off and cut the closed seam off in one long piece.
Like this.

Halve that (folding the short way) and cut. Take remaining fabric you cut off and glue, folding ragged edges in, into strap-like pieces. Four of them. (Cut once the long way, and one the short way.)
Try really hard not to remember the denim-sequin-y knotted thing that was your last sewing project. Of course, that was in high school. Ahh, high school. How did you get so old?? Go get wine. Drink wine.
(Repeat. Ssssssh!.) Stare worriedly at your almost-disaster.

But it's actually coming together. See?

Cursing, get out the hated needle and thread. Poke thread into needle, wonder idly if people still get ptomaine poisoning. Wander over to do some Googling. Rip yourself away when husband says what's that on the floor? Refill glass. Connect piece of seam with two of the strap pieces. (See above.)
Place your long strip at the top of your raggedy cut line. Fold material neatly over and glue, creating a channel with long fabric strip inside. (See above, again.)

**most of this cutting and sewing and piecing could be replaced by one long piece of ribbon. Next time I'll try to think of that,as it looks MUCH better.**

Whee! Now this is getting fun! Slide strip back and forth a few times to ensure it doesn't stick. Repeat for other side of dress. The glue directions say you need to leave it alone for half an hour. Spend it looking quizzically at your creation, trying to decide if your daughter is going to look like a little princess or a matchstick girl wearing a pillowcase. Dither. Don't forget your wine.

 Decide the bottom of the pillowcase (which is now the hem) isn't decorative enough all on its' own, and haul out the rick-rack. Glue rick-rack on with wild abandon.

Damn the empire! Save the rick-rack! *cough* Sorry, been jonesing to get that film out again....

Wait impatiently until child can be coerced into shedding jeans and top. 'Try this on', you say, importantly. 'I made it for you.' Chuckle to yourself (don't hiccup!) while finding obvious-to-you flaws.

But......it works. She loves it.

 

Now, I can see (with my critical eye) that this isn't everything I want this to be. Next time I will USE the ribbon through the top. I might even sew. For reals. I will probably cut it shorter (and these are so sweet as tops over shorts or leggings) and Rosey has requested more rick-rack. (Where did that come from? Really, I have no idea.)

Comments

[Jen Leheny]

too funny! it worked though so well done! I linked this on Facebook too :)

[julie seabury]

Empire Records is one of my favorite movies!! And I love the dress :)